I was inspired by the latest Backlisted episode to pick up a Bowen – specifically the one they covered, Death of the Heart, but it turns out that I don’t own it – so I substituted a novella of 151 pages, Friends and Relations (1931). It’s not one I see people talk about all that much, but I thought it on par with her others – the usual hallmarks of exceptionally beautiful and perceptive writing, and a plot that is never quite obvious.
The story opens at the wedding of Laurel Studdart and James Tilney. It is a very proper, slightly passionless affair. I loved this exchange, showing Bowen’s talent for dialogue that does a lot more than is evident on the surface.
‘You might hold your lilies,’ said Mrs Studdart, who had discovered the sheaf on a hall table specially cleared for the top-hats.
‘Oh, Mother, I can’t; they’re heavy.’
‘But don’t you think it would be nice, Edward, if she were to hold her lilies?’
‘I don’t know,’ said Edward. ‘Do people generally?’
‘They’d be such a strain on one arm all the time. You see I can’t change them; I must keep my right arm for shaking hands.’
‘And shake hands lightly,’ said Mrs Studdart, ‘don’t grip.’
‘Did I look …?’
‘Lovely, lovely,’ said Mrs Studdart. She was looking round distractedly for a vase and soon found one, a kind of Italian urn in which she arranged the lilies beside the bride.
It’s not long before Laurel’s sister Janet gets married – though this is rather more of a surprise to the family, as Janet was not expected to do anything so fortunate and conventional. What’s a little less conventional is that she is marrying the nephew of the man who had an adulterous affair with Edward’s mother. If that sentence is a little confusing, fear not, it’s clear in the book – essentially the dark horses in the family tree of both sisters’ new husbands are tangled together.
I found Laurel and Janet both rather unknowable. I’d be hard pressed to describe their personalities, and perhaps that reflects the rather controlled conversations they have with each other – appropriately sisterly to appearances, but without giving too much away.
On the other hand there is Theodora, easily my favourite character in Friends and Relations, and the most vivid. We see her first as a 15 year old at the wedding, pressing ice creams on unwilling guests and believing herself to be doing a great kindness, loudly berating her parents for huddling together, and evading speaking to the bride by walking outside and round the building to get to the food. She dominates her parents, finding them deeply embarrassing and forever correcting things that only a child would notice. It is a pitch perfect portrait, and funny too.
We move forward ten years into the past – both marriages have children, Theodora is still around, and the dark horses of the past are still having their effect on the future. There is a turning point in this section, but also the sense that the past lingers long over future generations.
I found I didn’t always know exactly what was going on, partly because Bowen’s writing is too complex to rush-read in a novella-a-day challenge, and partly because everybody prevaricates. The dialogue is never there for exposition; it is more realistic, and gives a rich sense of the relationships between people, rather than the details of the plot. I had to go back and re-read bits to try and piece things together. But it didn’t stop me enjoying Bowen’s striking writing. So many lovely sentences – I noted down one about a cat, of course: “The Siamese, reappearing like a malign sun over the cushions, looked at his mistress with penetration, without sympathy.”
Ultimately, I might land more on admiring Bowen than loving her – but there is so much to admire that that is no weak praise.



When Brad of 



I had a little blogging absence because I had a nasty cold – which I presumed might be Covid, given how everyone seems to have it at the moment, but a zillion tests turned out negative. Just a normal cold! Back to normal winter life!

